Bearded Theory

I’m not really sure who’s got it right here, is it me sat in an empty festival ground at 6.45 in the morning, enjoying a bit of fresh air, pondering on such trivialities as how the bearded theory might have got its name, and wondering how on earth the ground staff of this beautiful country house are going to put right all the trampling damage and drink spillages caused by just one night of this three day event, surely beer cant be good for grass can it?! Or have those still blissfully unaware of my presence, or that of any other form humanity for that matter, still sleeping, some very audibly so, unconsciously preparing themselves for another day of partying got it right? Who cares, I don’t want to miss a waking minute of the festival! 

Last night was Friday, the opening night of the festival, the night when people arrive with a full tank of energy and excitement for what’s about to happen, and the happening, although chilly and slightly damp, was in full swing by the time Dr and the medics arrived on stage at 7 o’clock, basically a covers band that have had a hit, with a cover, but they managed very successfully to ramp the audience up to the max ready for Terrorvision who exploded onto the stage with so much enthusiasm you could quite easily forget that it wasn’t the 1990s, although it seemed that a lot of the audience had maybe forgotten that the 90s existed, or, quite disconcertingly for someone my age, maybe hadn’t even taken their first steps when the band were having chart success. Personally, I thought they rocked, but I have to admit to only being previously familiar with a couple of their songs, and I think that most of the audience was really just patiently waiting for the main act of the evening... Adam ant!

The Antmeister looking slightly less trim than in his hey day (aren’t we all!), still looks good, and he certainly played up to the audience. It’s always going to be difficult to re-create the sound of the recordings that everyone is familiar with especially when you’ve been out of the lime light for so long and probably don’t have record company money to spend on backing singers and incidental instruments and sounds. Lets also not forget that he isn’t really a festival act and is more used to a crowd that has paid specifically to see him, all in all I would say he did a good job and the audience enjoyed the show, and were at least pleased to have seen what, for anybody in their 40s, is a bit of legend. 

SOLD OUT was plastered all over the website this year, and that must be re-assurance for the organisers that they are doing things right here, its very much a family festival, although it is still 5000 people in a field with a bar and probably 50,000 watts of music hammering out its message, so I wouldn’t give it full child festival status, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing to my mind, I didn’t come to watch my P`s &Qs!

The Bearded theory like most festivals is more than just a main stage, and they obviously put a lot of time and research into finding bands and performances that will make their festival different and keep people entertained, but at the same time, give lesser known acts a platform on which to get noticed, and these smaller stages are the sort of places a lot of successful bands start. I cant count the amount of times ive looked back a previous festivals programmes and noticed now famous people way down the line up and thought *~##! I missed that one! So my tip is to always get to see as much as you can, cos you never know. 

The Waters Edge stage was one of those places to keep an eye on. Built, owned and run by Nathan of twistup productions, a small draw bar trailer dramatically painted in metallic red with a drop down side, a sail for an awning and a P.A considerably smaller than that of the main stage or Tornado town, the performers here would have to work that bit harder to get an audience to listen, but over the course of the weekend I saw some truly inspiring original music being played here from the likes of Bemis, Ben Ottewell, the true Deceivers as well as a master class in how to attract, entertain and keep an audience engaged  Hobo Jones and the junk yard dogs style.   

Saturday afternoon, and a small audience was allowed into the back street bar to watch a performance by three daft monkeys, followed by Mark Chadwick from the Levellers. This was being filmed live (apparently) for festival TV. Watching this with its two fledgling presenters who seemed un-aware of who they were interviewing, was quite amusing at times and makes you wonder if all live TV is this disjointed live? But the bands played well and it was quite a privilege to be among those getting in to see these festival legends.   

But for me, in a completely self indulgent way, the two Saturday headliners jointly stole the best main stage acts award of the weekend (if there was one).

 Dr Feelgood with not an original member amongst them, could well have turned out to be a disappointment, but with 74 years service to the Dr between 4 of them, I think you could safely say they’ve passed the audition and were well qualified to belt out the classics “Roxette”, back in the night”, “down at the doctors” and of course “milk and alcohol” better than any ordinary covers band, and with singer Robert Kane more than admirably  filling the shoes of the late lee Brilleaux, I don’t think anyone watching would disagree..rhythm and blues music don’t get no better than this. 

The final main stage act for Saturday was the Damned, quite a brave headliner I thought, although having spoken to Andy, the main stage manager the next day, it appears I was wrong! (something you wont hear me say too often). The Damned have been top of the Bearded theory’s punters forum wish list for the last 5 years, so this was actually a dream booking for all concerned. This would   explain why come the moment the band arrived on stage, you could barely find room to re-buckle a bondage strap and people on the peripheries were stood on any pogo-able surface just to get a view. 

The band obviously appreciated the audience response and played their Damned best through a back catalogue of songs, some I’d completely forgotten about, but still somehow knew the words to, and finished the set with a balls out version of smash it up. 

Sunday morning and you might think with all the fun, excitement and over indulgence of the previous two days, this would be a wind down day, surely no festival goer, organiser, entertainer or stall holder would have anything left to give…wrong!

Sunday kicked off with a formation display from the red barrows, a hilariously riotous routine of complete stupidity and clever wheel barrow-batics. Following this was the Bearded theory’s attempt to break its own world record for the number of false beards worn in the same place, with the winner being chosen by the crowd clap-o-meter and prize presented by Brendan B Brown from Wheatus who had performed on the Tornado town stage 10 mins earlier, I still don’t know if they succeeded in their attempt, but it was great fun trying! 

Sundays music programme on all stages continued in the same “A little something for everyone” vein, with Wheatus, Chumbawumba, Selector and festival headliners Dreadzone all drawing in massive audiences.

This really has to be one of the friendliest, full on and fun festivals I have ever been to, possibly their No corporate sponsorship attitude allows them freedom to listen to what their public are saying and even though it’s a pretty big affair, it still reminds me a lot of some of the smaller festivals I go to like Watchet live in Somerset and definitely deserves the award it won last year for best independent festival.